Chapter 7: Along Came Queenie
Back in his dressing room, Jack was delighted with his recent discovery. He had thought of one wish that could make him happy for the rest of his days, or so he thought.
"Oh, great magical hat," he proclaimed, "I wish I had a bottle o' rum."
With a little "pop!", a bottle of rum appeared on a chair. Jack gave a hoot of joy and rushed over to it. In his haste, however, he dropped Dulcinea and stepped on her. Now, you may think, dear reader, that hats can never be angry because they have no emotions. In this case, you would be quite wrong. After being abused so, Dulcinea decided to stop granting any of Jack's wishes. The pirate was happily drinking his alchoholic beverage, however, and could not have known Dulcinea's thoughts.
Oh, but Wisher, you may be saying, hats have no brains! Hats have no hearts!
Once again, you would be wrong. For hats can love and long to be loved, just as people can. Dulcinea could not really recall a time when she had not been with Merlin. She looked out for him, always hiding his bald spot, and he looked out for her. Until recently. Dulcinea did not particularly blame Merlin for not waking up when Jack had stolen her, but really, she was beginning to wonder if he truly, truly loved her. She had wondered this before when Janessa the frog had come into Merlin's life, but Janessa had soon died and that problem was solved. Dulcinea felt bad for Merlin, of course, but she had always wanted to be the one and only in his life, and no slimy little frog was going to stand in her way.
Dulcinea looked up at Jack from her place on the floor. He picked her up after a moment and said,
"I wish I had two well-endowed wenches right here, right now."
Dulcinea refused to grant that wish, and Jack stared at the hat and raised an eyebrow.
"Two. Wenches. Now."
No wenches appeared, so Jack decided to set out and find some on his own. He left Dulcinea behind in the dark dressing room. The poor hat was left wondering when her Merlin would come to rescue her.
______________________________
Meanwhile, the Hatter was making his way to the Haunted Mansion. He was really very terrified of the place and he felt his knees trembling as he came to its gate. The Mansion seemed to glare down at him, daring him to enter. Hatter gulped and stepped through the gates. He came to the long porch of the Mansion and regarded the pale woman who stood there.
"Um... I'm looking for a hat," Hatter told her, "Someone stole it. Any chance you've seen someone with a pointy purple hat?"
The woman only raised her arm and pointed to the doorway of the Mansion. Hatter nodded, assuming that she meant she had seen the culprit. Little did Hatter know that she only spoke Gaelic and had no idea what he had said. He also didn't know she was a vampire, but that is another story that shall be told at another time.
So the Hatter walked into the cobwebby darkness, his heart hammering and his hands shaking. What adventures (or midadventures) with the Mansion's residents would be instore for him?
_________________________
Cruella and Eugenia walked past the Castle, glowering at everyone. Glowering was one of Eugenia's favorite passtimes, and Cruella was certain that she herself had already perfected the art. The two wicked ladies marched toward the Wishing Well to discuss where to find bratty little Alice.
"Oh, shut up, Snow White!" Cruella shouted when she heard Snow White's high voice fill the air.
"My Barby loves her voice," Eugenia said.
"Yeah, well, your Barby is a loser."
Eugenia opened her mouth to respond in anger, but was cut short when Cruella suddenly called, "Queenie, dahling!"
Eugenia turned to see the Queen of Hearts coming their way. She smirked. How perfect! If they couldn't find nasty little Alice, the Queen could certainly help them in their quest for the White Rabbit.
"Cruella!" the Queen replied, swinging her flamingo, "How perfectly horrid to see you!"
"You, too, you old crone!" Cruella replied, for it is the custom that when villains greet each other, they must insult one another as a sign of friendship.
"And you, you old bat!" the Queen said, turning to Eugenia, "How's your filthy pirate?"
"Oh, he's-" Eugenia began, but Cruella interrupted her, not wanting to hear about Barbossa.
"Listen, Queenie, dahling, we need to find someone," Cruella said, taking the Queen by her frighteningly buff arm, "He's short, and white, and-"
"You mean Donald Duck? Sorry, Cruella, but I frightened him off this morning by threatening to cook him for dinner."
"No, no, I meant the White Rabbit."
"Oh. Him. Well, I believe I saw him in Adventureland this morning."
"Adventureland?" Eugenia asked, surprised.
"Why, yes. I was taking an early morning ride on the Jungle Cruise and saw him skipping about in the jungle. Very odd, but there you have it."
Eugenia silently wondered what this was all about, but supposed that it was better not to ask. Instead, she said,
"Well, we're looking for him because Cruella thinks he would make a lovely addition to her collection of furs."
The Queen's eyes widened for a moment, but then she remembered that she was a villainess after all and delighted in wicked plans.
"Why, Cruella, what a clever plan!" she said, although something in her heart told her it was wrong to say so, "Of course I'll help! Come, let us look in Fantasyland first."
"But we just came from there," Eugenia said.
The Queen gave her a hideous glare that would have made a weaker woman faint.
"All ways are my ways," she hissed.
Eugenia nodded and the three of them, Cruella, Eugenia, and Queenie, walked back into Fantasyland, glaring at passersby as they went. Little did they know that what would come next would change the course of their lives as villainesses forever.
- Wisher
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Chapter 6: That Darn Hat
Once in the Alice ride, Cruella and Eugenia soon realized to their great dismay that all the white rabbits were made of cardboard or wood. So they departed from the ride in disappointment. After talking it over, the two conniving comrades decided their best plan of action was to look for the bratty little Alice. For, where Alice was, there was a good chance the white rabbit couldn’t be far behind.
-------
Jack tried to squeeze on the hat again, but it still didn’t fit him. He considered cutting off some of his dreadlocks but then realized that would be taking it a bit too far.
“Oh you stupid little hat thing. I wish you would just fit my head!”
As soon as he muttered the words aloud to himself, he saw the hat grow slightly larger in size. Filled with awe, Jack once again slowly brought the hat to his head, hesitantly trying it on. IT FIT!
“Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle! I wonder…” he fiddled with the hat some more but, for the life of him, the pirate could not figure out what he had done to make the hat suddenly fit his head.
“I wish I could understand how to work the bloody thing.” He muttered.
No sooner had the words passed Jack’s rum-stained lips when he suddenly completely understood the hat’s purpose. It had the power to make wishes come true.
Now, this, I can have some fun with, thought Jack, with a smirk, imagining the possibilities.
-------
Meanwhile, Merlin and Hatter were just disembarking from their ride along the happiest cruise that ever sailed. But the two were not the happiest character’s that ever sailed, that was for sure.
For one thing, Merlin was deep in sad thought about his beloved hat and the good times they had had together. Hatter on the other hand, was busy writing down notes about every suspicious looking doll and piece of scenery he had seen on the ride.
“That little blondie in Switzerland sure looked like she was hiding something. Did you see the way her eyes shifted back and forth so fast?? It was almost…mechanical. Yes, I will have to look further into this.” Sherlock Hatter furiously scribbled something on his notepad, and then continued, “And I just have a really bad feeling about that big Sun. Did you see that fake smile on his face??? He’s a part of this…I just know it! Merlin? Merlin???”
But Merlin hadn’t heard a word. He was too lost in his own thoughts. At the moment, he had been reliving a splendid memory of him and Dulcinea at the park. Ah, what a day that had been. After a joyful ride on the swings and a sunny picnic on the grass they had sat and reveled in their happiness for hours. Until they had happened to come across a little lost frog. Merlin had taken the creature into his own care and had named his new friend “Janessa”. That had been the start of a beautiful friendship…until…
“Merlin!!! Are you crying??” an obnoxious Hatter shouted loudly, breaking poor Merlin from his deep thoughts.
Merlin quickly wiped away a tear that had crept upon his cheek, “No, I- Of course not!” he sniffed angrily.
“Oh good then! So, who do you think it was, Merlin? The Switzerland girl, or the Sun? OOH! Or the water fountain?? I haven’t ruled him out yet!” he said as he shot a glare in the direction of said water fountain.
But Merlin had simply had enough. He needed to be alone. But, being the nice old man that he was (albeit, he was prone to a few tantrums) he decided he would rid himself of the Hatter graciously.
“Hatter, I really think you should search inside the Haunted Mansion,” he began, “I’m sure there are many suspicious persons in there that may have something to do with all this.”
In truth, the Mad Hatter was more than a bit frightened of the Haunted Mansion, but he didn’t want Merlin to think so, so he agreed.
“Yes, er, yes, I think that would be a splendid idea. Shall we go?”
“Oh, uh, no…Hatter, I’m afraid I will not be accompanying you this time…” he saw the obvious disappointment that registered on Hatter’s face and, feeling a little bit guilty, Merlin continued, “For you see, I, um, have to…keep an eye on…the ant! Yes, the ant! It’s a small job, I know, but you are so much better at this than me and, well, I thought I would give you the more important job.”
The Hatter suddenly brightened and for a moment, he forgot all about his fear of ghosts and floating objects.
“I see what you mean, Merlin! I’m off to inspect the Mansion!” he cried with purpose as he ran toward New Orleans Square, leaving a slightly guilty, but very relieved, Merlin alone.
-Mickeylover
-------
Jack tried to squeeze on the hat again, but it still didn’t fit him. He considered cutting off some of his dreadlocks but then realized that would be taking it a bit too far.
“Oh you stupid little hat thing. I wish you would just fit my head!”
As soon as he muttered the words aloud to himself, he saw the hat grow slightly larger in size. Filled with awe, Jack once again slowly brought the hat to his head, hesitantly trying it on. IT FIT!
“Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle! I wonder…” he fiddled with the hat some more but, for the life of him, the pirate could not figure out what he had done to make the hat suddenly fit his head.
“I wish I could understand how to work the bloody thing.” He muttered.
No sooner had the words passed Jack’s rum-stained lips when he suddenly completely understood the hat’s purpose. It had the power to make wishes come true.
Now, this, I can have some fun with, thought Jack, with a smirk, imagining the possibilities.
-------
Meanwhile, Merlin and Hatter were just disembarking from their ride along the happiest cruise that ever sailed. But the two were not the happiest character’s that ever sailed, that was for sure.
For one thing, Merlin was deep in sad thought about his beloved hat and the good times they had had together. Hatter on the other hand, was busy writing down notes about every suspicious looking doll and piece of scenery he had seen on the ride.
“That little blondie in Switzerland sure looked like she was hiding something. Did you see the way her eyes shifted back and forth so fast?? It was almost…mechanical. Yes, I will have to look further into this.” Sherlock Hatter furiously scribbled something on his notepad, and then continued, “And I just have a really bad feeling about that big Sun. Did you see that fake smile on his face??? He’s a part of this…I just know it! Merlin? Merlin???”
But Merlin hadn’t heard a word. He was too lost in his own thoughts. At the moment, he had been reliving a splendid memory of him and Dulcinea at the park. Ah, what a day that had been. After a joyful ride on the swings and a sunny picnic on the grass they had sat and reveled in their happiness for hours. Until they had happened to come across a little lost frog. Merlin had taken the creature into his own care and had named his new friend “Janessa”. That had been the start of a beautiful friendship…until…
“Merlin!!! Are you crying??” an obnoxious Hatter shouted loudly, breaking poor Merlin from his deep thoughts.
Merlin quickly wiped away a tear that had crept upon his cheek, “No, I- Of course not!” he sniffed angrily.
“Oh good then! So, who do you think it was, Merlin? The Switzerland girl, or the Sun? OOH! Or the water fountain?? I haven’t ruled him out yet!” he said as he shot a glare in the direction of said water fountain.
But Merlin had simply had enough. He needed to be alone. But, being the nice old man that he was (albeit, he was prone to a few tantrums) he decided he would rid himself of the Hatter graciously.
“Hatter, I really think you should search inside the Haunted Mansion,” he began, “I’m sure there are many suspicious persons in there that may have something to do with all this.”
In truth, the Mad Hatter was more than a bit frightened of the Haunted Mansion, but he didn’t want Merlin to think so, so he agreed.
“Yes, er, yes, I think that would be a splendid idea. Shall we go?”
“Oh, uh, no…Hatter, I’m afraid I will not be accompanying you this time…” he saw the obvious disappointment that registered on Hatter’s face and, feeling a little bit guilty, Merlin continued, “For you see, I, um, have to…keep an eye on…the ant! Yes, the ant! It’s a small job, I know, but you are so much better at this than me and, well, I thought I would give you the more important job.”
The Hatter suddenly brightened and for a moment, he forgot all about his fear of ghosts and floating objects.
“I see what you mean, Merlin! I’m off to inspect the Mansion!” he cried with purpose as he ran toward New Orleans Square, leaving a slightly guilty, but very relieved, Merlin alone.
-Mickeylover
Chapter 5: In Which a Drinking Fountain is Interrogated
Meanwhile, the Hatter and Merlin were making their way to Small World. Merlin rather disliked being followed by the madman and was inwardly groaning every time the Hatter dashed over to an inanimate object to ask it questions. At the moment, Hatter was interrogating a tree.
"Don't you back-sass me! Where we you on the night of May eleventy-first? Don't play games with me, mister!"
Hatter glared at the tree for a moment, which stood in stubborn tree-like silence. Then he shrugged and hurried over to a nearby drinking fountain.
"Mr. Water-de-Fountain!" Hatter barked at it, "What were you doing the night my fine wizard friend's hat was hatnapped?"
He seemed to listen to the fountain, then narrowed his eyes.
"A likely story! Just sitting around and dripping! Well, I'll have you know I'm a trained detective, Water Boy, and-"
"Hatter," Merlin snapped, having had quite enough of the Hatter's current shenanigans, "We need to be on our way."
"Oh, yes, those rotten children. Little do they know I speak at least ten languages fluently! You want to know what they are?"
Merlin sighed. Hatter went on,
"Tea-ish, Sugar Cubese, Teabonics, Doileyish, Teapottery, Crumpetese..."
Merlin rolled his eyes as they walked onward toward the shrine to children that stood on the horizon: It's a Small World. Merlin recalled the last time he had been there... that was back when the boats didn't look like an add for Cool Whip. How long ago that had been. Those had been less trying times, but of course, he and his hat had been together then. He felt the mid-morning sun burn his bald spot and wanted to weep.
"Look!" Hatter shouted, interrupting Merlin's thoughts, "That rock looks awfully suspicious!"
"No, it doesn't," Merlin growled.
He grabbed Hatter's arm and they were finally able to bord a boat for the attraction (there were many odd Hatter moments, but they shall go unrecorded). As Merlin and Hatter rode into the somehow cheerful, multicultural darkness of Small World, Merlin wondered what would occur next and if any of it would lead to the recovery of his beloved hat, which he had always called Dulcinea. Sure, it was a rip-off from his old friend Don Quixote, but it seemed fitting.
"Oh, Dulcinea," Merlin thought to himself as that maddening song began to fill the air, "Where are you?"
_________________
Meanwhile, Cruella was headed for the Alice darkride in order to meet up with Eugenia. In the five minutes that it had taken her to leave Main Street and head into Fantasyland, Cruella had made ten children cry and one old man cry. She considered the old man to be worth extra points. At last, she stomped up to the ediface of "Alice in Wonderland" and peered impatiently around for Eugenia.
"Late!" Cruella growled.
She supposed that Eugenia was unable to leave her darling, ugly old pirate boyfriend's side, but just as Cruella was about to scream with rage, Eugenia appeared around the corner.
"There you are, Eugenia, dahling!" Cruella said.
"Pardon my tardiness, Cruella, but I-"
"Yes, yes, whatever," Cruella snapped, totally uninterested, "Let's go find that White Rabbit."
And with that, the two linked arms and went down the Rabbit Hole... down, down, down...
- Wisher
"Don't you back-sass me! Where we you on the night of May eleventy-first? Don't play games with me, mister!"
Hatter glared at the tree for a moment, which stood in stubborn tree-like silence. Then he shrugged and hurried over to a nearby drinking fountain.
"Mr. Water-de-Fountain!" Hatter barked at it, "What were you doing the night my fine wizard friend's hat was hatnapped?"
He seemed to listen to the fountain, then narrowed his eyes.
"A likely story! Just sitting around and dripping! Well, I'll have you know I'm a trained detective, Water Boy, and-"
"Hatter," Merlin snapped, having had quite enough of the Hatter's current shenanigans, "We need to be on our way."
"Oh, yes, those rotten children. Little do they know I speak at least ten languages fluently! You want to know what they are?"
Merlin sighed. Hatter went on,
"Tea-ish, Sugar Cubese, Teabonics, Doileyish, Teapottery, Crumpetese..."
Merlin rolled his eyes as they walked onward toward the shrine to children that stood on the horizon: It's a Small World. Merlin recalled the last time he had been there... that was back when the boats didn't look like an add for Cool Whip. How long ago that had been. Those had been less trying times, but of course, he and his hat had been together then. He felt the mid-morning sun burn his bald spot and wanted to weep.
"Look!" Hatter shouted, interrupting Merlin's thoughts, "That rock looks awfully suspicious!"
"No, it doesn't," Merlin growled.
He grabbed Hatter's arm and they were finally able to bord a boat for the attraction (there were many odd Hatter moments, but they shall go unrecorded). As Merlin and Hatter rode into the somehow cheerful, multicultural darkness of Small World, Merlin wondered what would occur next and if any of it would lead to the recovery of his beloved hat, which he had always called Dulcinea. Sure, it was a rip-off from his old friend Don Quixote, but it seemed fitting.
"Oh, Dulcinea," Merlin thought to himself as that maddening song began to fill the air, "Where are you?"
_________________
Meanwhile, Cruella was headed for the Alice darkride in order to meet up with Eugenia. In the five minutes that it had taken her to leave Main Street and head into Fantasyland, Cruella had made ten children cry and one old man cry. She considered the old man to be worth extra points. At last, she stomped up to the ediface of "Alice in Wonderland" and peered impatiently around for Eugenia.
"Late!" Cruella growled.
She supposed that Eugenia was unable to leave her darling, ugly old pirate boyfriend's side, but just as Cruella was about to scream with rage, Eugenia appeared around the corner.
"There you are, Eugenia, dahling!" Cruella said.
"Pardon my tardiness, Cruella, but I-"
"Yes, yes, whatever," Cruella snapped, totally uninterested, "Let's go find that White Rabbit."
And with that, the two linked arms and went down the Rabbit Hole... down, down, down...
- Wisher
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Chapter 4: Wedding Bells Are Ringing
Chapter 4: Wedding Bells Are Ringing
Cruella thought for a moment about the best way to get herself the elusive White Rabbit. She knew it was a feat she could not accomplish on her own. She needed a partner. Someone as evil and conniving as she was. Then she remembered her best friend, Lady Tremaine. She decided to give the evil matriarch a phone call.
She sat down to her fancy rotary phone and adjusted her fur coat. Today she was sporting raccoon. But soon she would be donning White Rabbit. An evil grin crept across the wicked woman’s face as she imagined how wonderfully the pure white of the fur would compliment her black and white hairstyle.
She dialed and waited for her friend to answer.
“Hello?” came the familiar raspy voice from the other end of the phone.
“Eugenia?” Cruella replied (for it is a little known fact that Eugenia is Lady Tremaine’s first name), “Darling! I need a favor…”
Then Cruella went on to explain her dilemma to her girlfriend, who quickly agreed to assist.
“Why I would love to!” Eugenia began, “This is just perfect, Cruella dear. You see, I’ll need a new white fur to wear in my wedding when my babykins Barbossa (for she and the swashbuckling pirate were an item – to find out more, read the original VF story) finally pops the question! I’m sure it will be any day now, really.”
In truth, Cruella was completely convinced the irresponsible pirate was not willing to commit to his beau Eugenia, but she refrained from saying so.
She also didn’t intend to share the white rabbits beautiful fur with her friend, but she didn’t mention that either. She would use Eugenia’s willing help now and worry about getting the whole rabbit for herself later.
Eugenia was still babbling on about her plans for her future wedding to Barbossa. “…I just can’t wait until he finally asks, Cruella! I already have the entire wedding party planned out. My girls will be such beautiful flower girls, don’t you think?”
Cruella told her friend that she agreed, though in her mind, she knew the sight of homely Drisella and Anastasia walking down the isle was one that would make many wedding guests want to puke.
She brightened, though, when she heard Eugenia mention that Cruella would be her maid of honor.
Maybe she could let Eugenia have a little tiny bit of the rabbit’s coat for her dress. Just a tiny bit.
The two evil ladies said goodbye on the phone and agreed to meet by the Alice in Wonderland ride to begin their search for the poor White Rabbit.
-Mickeylover
Cruella thought for a moment about the best way to get herself the elusive White Rabbit. She knew it was a feat she could not accomplish on her own. She needed a partner. Someone as evil and conniving as she was. Then she remembered her best friend, Lady Tremaine. She decided to give the evil matriarch a phone call.
She sat down to her fancy rotary phone and adjusted her fur coat. Today she was sporting raccoon. But soon she would be donning White Rabbit. An evil grin crept across the wicked woman’s face as she imagined how wonderfully the pure white of the fur would compliment her black and white hairstyle.
She dialed and waited for her friend to answer.
“Hello?” came the familiar raspy voice from the other end of the phone.
“Eugenia?” Cruella replied (for it is a little known fact that Eugenia is Lady Tremaine’s first name), “Darling! I need a favor…”
Then Cruella went on to explain her dilemma to her girlfriend, who quickly agreed to assist.
“Why I would love to!” Eugenia began, “This is just perfect, Cruella dear. You see, I’ll need a new white fur to wear in my wedding when my babykins Barbossa (for she and the swashbuckling pirate were an item – to find out more, read the original VF story) finally pops the question! I’m sure it will be any day now, really.”
In truth, Cruella was completely convinced the irresponsible pirate was not willing to commit to his beau Eugenia, but she refrained from saying so.
She also didn’t intend to share the white rabbits beautiful fur with her friend, but she didn’t mention that either. She would use Eugenia’s willing help now and worry about getting the whole rabbit for herself later.
Eugenia was still babbling on about her plans for her future wedding to Barbossa. “…I just can’t wait until he finally asks, Cruella! I already have the entire wedding party planned out. My girls will be such beautiful flower girls, don’t you think?”
Cruella told her friend that she agreed, though in her mind, she knew the sight of homely Drisella and Anastasia walking down the isle was one that would make many wedding guests want to puke.
She brightened, though, when she heard Eugenia mention that Cruella would be her maid of honor.
Maybe she could let Eugenia have a little tiny bit of the rabbit’s coat for her dress. Just a tiny bit.
The two evil ladies said goodbye on the phone and agreed to meet by the Alice in Wonderland ride to begin their search for the poor White Rabbit.
-Mickeylover
Monday, May 25, 2009
Chapter 3: Hats, and Fangirls, and Rabbits! Oh, my!
Oh, the glory of that purple hat! Jack felt it calling out to him. He moved, almost possessed, to his dressing table and snatched it up. He attempted to place in on his head, but he simply had too much hair.
"Oh, bugger!" he growled, "Couldn't ye grow just a little for me, o Purple Hat?"
Merlin's hat remained silent, much to Jack's frustration. He was used to inanimate objects talking to him, and never considered that it was most likely a side effect of all the rum. He tried to shove the hat onto his head, but it refused to stretch. Jack finally gave up with a huff of anger and tossed the hat back onto his dresser.
"Blast!" he growled, "Could it be that ye will fit no one but that batty old wizard?"
If it had the power, the hat would have smirked. But the hat had other powers. Little did Jack know what would become of him once he was taken over by them.
__________________
Meanwhile, Hatter was attempting to escape the angry Jack fangirls. But the fangirls would not budge and Hatter found himself surrounded.
"WE WANT JACK!" the girls shouted in horrifying unison, "WE WANT JACK!"
"But Jack left! Am I not good enough for you?" Hatter squeaked, becoming more frightened by the mob with every passing moment.
There was a great, horrible shout and someone grabbed Hatter's detective hat and hurled it towards the Teacups. Hatter gave a shriek and attempted to escape the fangirls' wrath.
"Merlin!" he cried desperately, "Heeeeeeeellllppp!"
Merlin rolled his eyes and raised his wand. The fangirls gasped and ran away, dissapearing through the Castle. Hatter sighed with relief then ran off to retrieve his detective hat. Merlin hurried after him. Once the hat had been recovered, he approached Hatter.
"Hatter, it's very kind of you to help me like this," he began, "but really, I can take it from here."
"But... that ant! I know he had something to do with this!" Hatter said.
Merlin sighed.
"Hatter, that ant had nothing to do with it. It's impossible."
"No, it's not! You have no idea how ferocious ants are! Didn't you ever see that old Donald Duck cartoon?"
Merlin rolled his eyes. This was going nowhere. He shook his head and marched off toward Small World to investigate there (because, having been so very old for so long, he had decided that children could not be trusted). Sherlock Hatter ran after him, determined to prove himself.
Neither of them saw the ant back at the Stone watch them leave with relief. Flick hadn't meant to get mixed up in the whole thing. He hadn't mean to be Jack's partner in crime. But when the pirate had offered him all the grain he and his colony could ever want, he had given in and spied on Merlin, waiting for the opportune moment when Jack could steal the wizard's hat. And that moment had come last night when Merlin was fast asleep.
_________________
On Main Street, Cruella was plotting an evil plan. She had spoken to Hatter a few days ago that was quite horrible. Their conversation had gone something like this:
"So... tell me about this white rabbit."
Here, Hatter had blinked. Cruella had grinned, sure that the White Rabbit would make a lovely addition to her collection of furs.
"No? What about the Cheshire Cat? Have you seen him recently?"
The Hatter had left, rather frightened of Cruella's plans. Today, Cruella had decided to find the White Rabbit and make him her own.
And she was sure that no one could stop her.
- Wisher
"Oh, bugger!" he growled, "Couldn't ye grow just a little for me, o Purple Hat?"
Merlin's hat remained silent, much to Jack's frustration. He was used to inanimate objects talking to him, and never considered that it was most likely a side effect of all the rum. He tried to shove the hat onto his head, but it refused to stretch. Jack finally gave up with a huff of anger and tossed the hat back onto his dresser.
"Blast!" he growled, "Could it be that ye will fit no one but that batty old wizard?"
If it had the power, the hat would have smirked. But the hat had other powers. Little did Jack know what would become of him once he was taken over by them.
__________________
Meanwhile, Hatter was attempting to escape the angry Jack fangirls. But the fangirls would not budge and Hatter found himself surrounded.
"WE WANT JACK!" the girls shouted in horrifying unison, "WE WANT JACK!"
"But Jack left! Am I not good enough for you?" Hatter squeaked, becoming more frightened by the mob with every passing moment.
There was a great, horrible shout and someone grabbed Hatter's detective hat and hurled it towards the Teacups. Hatter gave a shriek and attempted to escape the fangirls' wrath.
"Merlin!" he cried desperately, "Heeeeeeeellllppp!"
Merlin rolled his eyes and raised his wand. The fangirls gasped and ran away, dissapearing through the Castle. Hatter sighed with relief then ran off to retrieve his detective hat. Merlin hurried after him. Once the hat had been recovered, he approached Hatter.
"Hatter, it's very kind of you to help me like this," he began, "but really, I can take it from here."
"But... that ant! I know he had something to do with this!" Hatter said.
Merlin sighed.
"Hatter, that ant had nothing to do with it. It's impossible."
"No, it's not! You have no idea how ferocious ants are! Didn't you ever see that old Donald Duck cartoon?"
Merlin rolled his eyes. This was going nowhere. He shook his head and marched off toward Small World to investigate there (because, having been so very old for so long, he had decided that children could not be trusted). Sherlock Hatter ran after him, determined to prove himself.
Neither of them saw the ant back at the Stone watch them leave with relief. Flick hadn't meant to get mixed up in the whole thing. He hadn't mean to be Jack's partner in crime. But when the pirate had offered him all the grain he and his colony could ever want, he had given in and spied on Merlin, waiting for the opportune moment when Jack could steal the wizard's hat. And that moment had come last night when Merlin was fast asleep.
_________________
On Main Street, Cruella was plotting an evil plan. She had spoken to Hatter a few days ago that was quite horrible. Their conversation had gone something like this:
"So... tell me about this white rabbit."
Here, Hatter had blinked. Cruella had grinned, sure that the White Rabbit would make a lovely addition to her collection of furs.
"No? What about the Cheshire Cat? Have you seen him recently?"
The Hatter had left, rather frightened of Cruella's plans. Today, Cruella had decided to find the White Rabbit and make him her own.
And she was sure that no one could stop her.
- Wisher
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Chapter 2: Sherlock Hatter
Chapter 2: Sherlock Hatter
The Hatter hung up the phone with Merlin suddenly feeling very determined and excited. After all, it wasn’t everyday he had the chance to search for a missing hat. He quickly called the March Hare to inform him that he could not make their usual noontime tea party, and then went searching for his extra-large magnifying glass and his special detective notebook. After he had found all his essentials, the Hatter leapt off in the direction of the Mad Hatter Hat Shop in Fantasyland. When he reached the store, he quickly ran inside. Upon entering the shop, he slowly surveyed the myriad of hats displayed in the store, searching for the perfect one. At last he found it. It was the perfect detective’s hat. In fact, it looked very much like something the Hatter’s hero, Sherlock Holmes, would wear.
“This is it!” he cried in excitement as he raised the detective’s hat in the air, causing some curious passers by to stare.
But the Hatter was used to the stares. He knew people stared because they were drawn to his rugged good looks. He was too much in a hurry now, though, to stick around and revel in his celebrity, so the Hatter ignored the onlookers and hurried out the door. But he didn’t forget to wave to his favorite CM, Regina (who manned the checkout counter) on his way out. He liked Regina because she always hooked him up with free hats.
Then the Hatter ran as fast as he could to the sword in the stone in front of King Arthur’s Carousel where he and Merlin had agreed to meet. He could not see Merlin so he decided to pass the time by studying the sword with his magnifying glass to see if he could spot any clues.
Soon a very suspicious looking ant caught the madman’s attention, but his inspection was interrupted when he heard a noise coming from behind him.
“Psst! Hatter! Over here!” The strange voice angrily hissed.
Hatter straightened up and turned around, thinking he might see Merlin. But instead, he was startled to see a strange-looking figure wearing a large black cape with a hood that covered his entire head.
“AH!” Shouted the Hatter in alarm, “Who are you?!”
“Shush, Hatter!” scolded the hooded creature, “It is I, Merlin!”
Merlin lifted his hood so that it was just high enough so that Hatter could see his face but still low enough to keep his bald spot hidden from public view.
“MERLIN!” the Hatter screamed, much, MUCH louder then his companion would have liked. “I’m so glad you are here! You see I think I’ve had a break in the case! This ant here may be the key to—“
Merlin groaned. This was going to be much more difficult than he had thought. “Hatter, an ant could not have stolen my hat. That is simply impossible.”
Hatter tried to hide his dismay, “I suppose you are right. But now that we have no leads…what do we do?”
Both men thought for a moment…Suddenly the Hatter brightened. “Oh I know! We need to interview suspects!” he said excitedly as he grabbed poor Merlin’s arm and they were off.
-----
It had been more than a few hours since Hatter and an unwilling Merlin had begun their search for the illusive purple hat and Merlin wasn’t too sure they were getting anywhere at all. Hatter wasn’t doing a very good job interviewing “suspects”. His questions had nothing to do with the case and he kept trying to intimidate everyone he spoke to. On top of it all, he became very insistent that EVERYONE refer to him as “Sherlock Hatter”.
At this very moment he was questioning a very confused Alice.
“Now, I want the truth and NOTHING BUT the truth!” he began, “And I don’t want you trying any funny business!”
“But Hatter, I –“ Alice began, while wiping away a tear.
“DO NOT call me Hatter!” the lunatic interjected, “It’s Sherlock Hatter, to you!”
Alice did not like the way the Hatter spoke to her, so she stomped off angrily.
“Wait! Come back here! I have more questions for you!” shouted Hatter, but it was too late. He had driven away yet another suspect.
“There has to be a reason she stalked away like that…I’ll bet all the tea in the world that it’s because she’s in cahoots with that ant I saw at the stone! Yes! That has to be it…”
Merlin sighed inwardly. This was not going well at all. He was worried now that his hat would never be found again. A tear trickled down the poor old man’s face as he thought of losing his hat forever just like he had lost…his sweet frog Janessa. What would he do without his trademark purple hat? Nothing would ever be the same. No one would recognize him without it. And the news would finally get out about his bald spot! He would have no choice but to use that dreaded hair growth cream. But he hated that stuff! It got all sticky and stuck to his fingers and never worked when he had tried it before.
His thoughts were interrupted though, by the overwhelming sound of screaming girls. Hatter and Merlin both looked to where the girls were gathering.
“One at a time, ladies. There’s plenty Jack to go around!” came a drunken voice from the thick of the crowd.
Jack Sparrow. Of course. thought Merlin, who felt a twinge of jealousy when he thought of Jack’s thick head of dreadlocks.
Hatter, on the other hand, still had the mystery on his mind. “A pirate! Of course, who better to be a hat thief?!”
So the Hatter marched through the crowd of crazed fan-girls and made his way toward Jack. He pulled him out of the crowd quite forcefully, prepared to grill the pirate and finally discover the purple hat’s whereabouts.
“Hatter! What’s gotten into you?” a dazed Jack replied.
“It’s Sherlock Hatter.” The Hatter replied, matter-of-factly, “and I have a few questions for you about the disappearance of a certain wizard’s hat…”
“H-Hat? What hat?” Jack stuttered, faltering a bit, then regaining his composure suddenly, “No, mate, I haven’t seen any wizard hat.”
But Sherlock Hatter was not convinced. Before he could ask anymore questions, though, Jack muttered something about having to re-apply his eyeliner and dashed away, leaving a very confused and suspicious Hatter behind to fend for himself with a bunch of angry fan-girls. This could not end well.
----
Jack spoke to no one as he made his way to his dressing room. Once he had entered into the safety of his quarters and was sure no one had followed him, he breathed a deep sigh of relief.
He looked at the treasured item on his dresser and breathed another sigh to see it was still untouched. “Well, hello there luv. Our secret is safe for now.” He said aloud to the object.
For on that dresser sat Merlin’s precious purple hat.
-Mickeylover
The Hatter hung up the phone with Merlin suddenly feeling very determined and excited. After all, it wasn’t everyday he had the chance to search for a missing hat. He quickly called the March Hare to inform him that he could not make their usual noontime tea party, and then went searching for his extra-large magnifying glass and his special detective notebook. After he had found all his essentials, the Hatter leapt off in the direction of the Mad Hatter Hat Shop in Fantasyland. When he reached the store, he quickly ran inside. Upon entering the shop, he slowly surveyed the myriad of hats displayed in the store, searching for the perfect one. At last he found it. It was the perfect detective’s hat. In fact, it looked very much like something the Hatter’s hero, Sherlock Holmes, would wear.
“This is it!” he cried in excitement as he raised the detective’s hat in the air, causing some curious passers by to stare.
But the Hatter was used to the stares. He knew people stared because they were drawn to his rugged good looks. He was too much in a hurry now, though, to stick around and revel in his celebrity, so the Hatter ignored the onlookers and hurried out the door. But he didn’t forget to wave to his favorite CM, Regina (who manned the checkout counter) on his way out. He liked Regina because she always hooked him up with free hats.
Then the Hatter ran as fast as he could to the sword in the stone in front of King Arthur’s Carousel where he and Merlin had agreed to meet. He could not see Merlin so he decided to pass the time by studying the sword with his magnifying glass to see if he could spot any clues.
Soon a very suspicious looking ant caught the madman’s attention, but his inspection was interrupted when he heard a noise coming from behind him.
“Psst! Hatter! Over here!” The strange voice angrily hissed.
Hatter straightened up and turned around, thinking he might see Merlin. But instead, he was startled to see a strange-looking figure wearing a large black cape with a hood that covered his entire head.
“AH!” Shouted the Hatter in alarm, “Who are you?!”
“Shush, Hatter!” scolded the hooded creature, “It is I, Merlin!”
Merlin lifted his hood so that it was just high enough so that Hatter could see his face but still low enough to keep his bald spot hidden from public view.
“MERLIN!” the Hatter screamed, much, MUCH louder then his companion would have liked. “I’m so glad you are here! You see I think I’ve had a break in the case! This ant here may be the key to—“
Merlin groaned. This was going to be much more difficult than he had thought. “Hatter, an ant could not have stolen my hat. That is simply impossible.”
Hatter tried to hide his dismay, “I suppose you are right. But now that we have no leads…what do we do?”
Both men thought for a moment…Suddenly the Hatter brightened. “Oh I know! We need to interview suspects!” he said excitedly as he grabbed poor Merlin’s arm and they were off.
-----
It had been more than a few hours since Hatter and an unwilling Merlin had begun their search for the illusive purple hat and Merlin wasn’t too sure they were getting anywhere at all. Hatter wasn’t doing a very good job interviewing “suspects”. His questions had nothing to do with the case and he kept trying to intimidate everyone he spoke to. On top of it all, he became very insistent that EVERYONE refer to him as “Sherlock Hatter”.
At this very moment he was questioning a very confused Alice.
“Now, I want the truth and NOTHING BUT the truth!” he began, “And I don’t want you trying any funny business!”
“But Hatter, I –“ Alice began, while wiping away a tear.
“DO NOT call me Hatter!” the lunatic interjected, “It’s Sherlock Hatter, to you!”
Alice did not like the way the Hatter spoke to her, so she stomped off angrily.
“Wait! Come back here! I have more questions for you!” shouted Hatter, but it was too late. He had driven away yet another suspect.
“There has to be a reason she stalked away like that…I’ll bet all the tea in the world that it’s because she’s in cahoots with that ant I saw at the stone! Yes! That has to be it…”
Merlin sighed inwardly. This was not going well at all. He was worried now that his hat would never be found again. A tear trickled down the poor old man’s face as he thought of losing his hat forever just like he had lost…his sweet frog Janessa. What would he do without his trademark purple hat? Nothing would ever be the same. No one would recognize him without it. And the news would finally get out about his bald spot! He would have no choice but to use that dreaded hair growth cream. But he hated that stuff! It got all sticky and stuck to his fingers and never worked when he had tried it before.
His thoughts were interrupted though, by the overwhelming sound of screaming girls. Hatter and Merlin both looked to where the girls were gathering.
“One at a time, ladies. There’s plenty Jack to go around!” came a drunken voice from the thick of the crowd.
Jack Sparrow. Of course. thought Merlin, who felt a twinge of jealousy when he thought of Jack’s thick head of dreadlocks.
Hatter, on the other hand, still had the mystery on his mind. “A pirate! Of course, who better to be a hat thief?!”
So the Hatter marched through the crowd of crazed fan-girls and made his way toward Jack. He pulled him out of the crowd quite forcefully, prepared to grill the pirate and finally discover the purple hat’s whereabouts.
“Hatter! What’s gotten into you?” a dazed Jack replied.
“It’s Sherlock Hatter.” The Hatter replied, matter-of-factly, “and I have a few questions for you about the disappearance of a certain wizard’s hat…”
“H-Hat? What hat?” Jack stuttered, faltering a bit, then regaining his composure suddenly, “No, mate, I haven’t seen any wizard hat.”
But Sherlock Hatter was not convinced. Before he could ask anymore questions, though, Jack muttered something about having to re-apply his eyeliner and dashed away, leaving a very confused and suspicious Hatter behind to fend for himself with a bunch of angry fan-girls. This could not end well.
----
Jack spoke to no one as he made his way to his dressing room. Once he had entered into the safety of his quarters and was sure no one had followed him, he breathed a deep sigh of relief.
He looked at the treasured item on his dresser and breathed another sigh to see it was still untouched. “Well, hello there luv. Our secret is safe for now.” He said aloud to the object.
For on that dresser sat Merlin’s precious purple hat.
-Mickeylover
Saturday, May 23, 2009
So it begins!
Hello out there! Wisher here! And now, the first chapter...
Chapter 1: The hat-napping
The sun rose over Disneyland. Colors were illuminated, birds sang, and all the ghosts from the Haunted Mansion headed home after a joyous night of haunting. Princesses rose from their beds and happily said good morning to their woodland creature friends, pirates did their morning vocal exercises to prepare for a full day of singing, and Harold the yeti practiced his roaring.
Yet all was not well in Fantasyland. Merlin had awoken to discover that someone had hat-napped his pointy purple chapeau, and he was terribly upset. He had called the Mad Hatter, who he thought might have taken his hat as a joke.
"Hatter!" he roared into the phone, "I'll have no more of this nonsense!"
"What are you talking about, Merlin?" Hatter asked, wondering why the batty old wizard was interrupting his morning cup of tea.
"You stole my hat, you tea-obsessed madman!"
"I most certainly did not!"
"But... I... I thought..." Merlin faltered.
Hatter was surprised to hear a long wail from Merlin. The only other time Hatter had known the old wizard to be so upset was when his beloved pet frog, Janessa, had died several years ago.
"My show starts again in just a few weeks! I can't go on like this! What would people say? How would I hide my bald spot?"
Hatter was rather surprised to hear the poor old fellow weeping, but he understood completely. Why, if someone were to steal his hat, he would be horribly incomplete. Something about Merlin's plight touched Hatter's heart and he sighed.
"Listen, Merly..."
"It's Merlin," Merlin snapped.
"...I'll help you find your hat. We'll get to the bottom of this."
Merlin quickly imagined several different scenarios that could occur with Detective Hatter on the loose, each one more horribly embarrassing than the last. Still, what could he do? Hatter was offering his help and Merlin couldn't just say no.
"Thank you, Hatter," he said into his glittery purple phone.
"No trouble at all, old gent! Now, first I'll have to call Marchy, and then find my extra-large magnifying glass, and then put up some "Have you seen this hat?" signs..."
Merlin sighed as Hatter babbled on and on. The old wizard shook his head and wished he could have just said no.
Chapter 1: The hat-napping
The sun rose over Disneyland. Colors were illuminated, birds sang, and all the ghosts from the Haunted Mansion headed home after a joyous night of haunting. Princesses rose from their beds and happily said good morning to their woodland creature friends, pirates did their morning vocal exercises to prepare for a full day of singing, and Harold the yeti practiced his roaring.
Yet all was not well in Fantasyland. Merlin had awoken to discover that someone had hat-napped his pointy purple chapeau, and he was terribly upset. He had called the Mad Hatter, who he thought might have taken his hat as a joke.
"Hatter!" he roared into the phone, "I'll have no more of this nonsense!"
"What are you talking about, Merlin?" Hatter asked, wondering why the batty old wizard was interrupting his morning cup of tea.
"You stole my hat, you tea-obsessed madman!"
"I most certainly did not!"
"But... I... I thought..." Merlin faltered.
Hatter was surprised to hear a long wail from Merlin. The only other time Hatter had known the old wizard to be so upset was when his beloved pet frog, Janessa, had died several years ago.
"My show starts again in just a few weeks! I can't go on like this! What would people say? How would I hide my bald spot?"
Hatter was rather surprised to hear the poor old fellow weeping, but he understood completely. Why, if someone were to steal his hat, he would be horribly incomplete. Something about Merlin's plight touched Hatter's heart and he sighed.
"Listen, Merly..."
"It's Merlin," Merlin snapped.
"...I'll help you find your hat. We'll get to the bottom of this."
Merlin quickly imagined several different scenarios that could occur with Detective Hatter on the loose, each one more horribly embarrassing than the last. Still, what could he do? Hatter was offering his help and Merlin couldn't just say no.
"Thank you, Hatter," he said into his glittery purple phone.
"No trouble at all, old gent! Now, first I'll have to call Marchy, and then find my extra-large magnifying glass, and then put up some "Have you seen this hat?" signs..."
Merlin sighed as Hatter babbled on and on. The old wizard shook his head and wished he could have just said no.
And there you have it. Onward, Mickeylover! Onward!
- Wisher
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